Happy Birthday Luke Walton and Lady Gaga!

That's an odd pairing, right? The Los Angeles Lakers' current coach and former player, and the overwhelmingly eccentric, undeniably talented one-woman phenomenon, respectively. I'll bet you know who they both are, or at least have heard of them, but had no idea they shared a birthday. Not the exact same day, mind you. Walton turns 38 today. Gaga a few years behind at 32. I bet you're thinking, "Where could this article possibly be going if it's centered around these two individuals?" Well, it's not actually about them.

It's about me.

Fun fact: I share a birthday with these two individuals. Crazy, right? People have told me on too many occasions to count that I look like Luke. I always respond by stating this amusing piece of trivia, quick to clarify that Luke has me by a few years. (I'll have to make a point to remember that it's a difference of six years.) As for Gaga and I, we were born on the exact same day! Weird to think that we're the same age. Feels like she's been around forever.

That's kind of the point I'm going for here.

I'm 32 years old. I simultaneously feel young and old all the time. Like, I've been around for a long enough amount of time to have accomplished significantly more, yet I can look back and know that I've packed a lot into that time.

Things that make me feel old:

• Steph Curry has been around for a while as a superstar in the NBA. He just turned 30. 
• "Remember the Titans" is one of my favorite movies of all time, and I saw it when it was released in 2000 while I was in high school. NONE of my current students were born yet.
•  I've been a fan of the St. Louis/Los Angeles Rams longer than I haven't.
• Floppy discs, cassette tapes and VCRs had major significance in my life for a long time.
• I graduated high school 15 years ago.
• The music kids listen to nowadays has officially become noise that I do not understand and have no interest in.

(I'll add parenthetically that I am fully aware that there are plenty of people older than me who can attest to similar things to a further extent. Ok. You're older than me. Make your own list. This is about why I feel aged.)

Another list that makes me feel old is people whose lives ended before reaching my age:

• Buddy Holly, 22
• River Phoenix, 23
• James Dean, 24
• Otis Redding, 26
• Jimi Hendrix, 27
• Sylvia Plath, 30
• Bruce Lee, 32

Others who I am fast approaching:

• Jesus, 33
• Sam Cooke, 33
• Josh Gibson, 35
• Bob Marley, 36
• Princess Diana, 36
• Malcolm X, 39
• Martin Luther King, Jr, 39

Now, attempting to compare what I've done in my life to these people is obviously absurd. They are some of the most talented, intelligent, driven individuals in their various fortes. But that's also kind of the point. Despite their young ages, they still managed to reach the pinnacle of their discipline and leave behind a terrific legacy. I've managed to compile a resume that includes Weinerschnitzel, Albertson's, Lowe's, Blockbuster, and silk flower delivery, a college degree that took seven years to attain, and an incomplete teaching credential.

This is starting to sound like a pathetic lament on my "failures" in life. It's not; I promise. It's an honest reflection of where I am and how I got here.

Transitioning into another area: 

Relationships.

I've been involved in exactly one serious relationship. I don't have a good way to elaborate on the reasons for this. Do I wish I was married and had multiple kids already? Yes. Do I fear not starting a family until it's almost too late? Or, beyond that, never getting to that point at all? Definitely. This is not some sort of lament and woe-is-me proclamation. I accept full responsibility in this area. I will admit, this is a constant internal battle and has been for a long time. It has similar psychology to my extended college experience and diverse work history. If I would have stuck to the path I had laid out for myself early on (Business degree, Sports Management master's, low-level front office job for a sports franchise anywhere, work my way up over the years), I would not be where I am and would not have had the experiences I have had over the last decade. If I had been involved in a committed relationship and started a family, I would not have the relationships I currently have with students and friends, being able to pour into their lives while also having them pour into me. At least, not nearly to the same degree. This makes weddings the single greatest and worst events for me to attend. I love celebrating the union of friends to a future life of committed love and joy, and doing so while surrounded by great friends. I hate being reminded that I don't have that person in my own life.

Here's what this is not: A cry for help. DO NOT read this as a desperate letter looking for recognition and reassurances. Nor am I asking you to find someone to set me up with. Proceed as you feel led, not leaping to action, or hesitating, simply as a result of this post. I don't mind sharing these things because I would love to have conversations about them. This is life. This is where I'm at. I'm willing to share that with you, and hear where you're at as well.

I love my life. I truly do. I would not go back and change anything if it meant I am not doing the exact same things in life. My years as a teacher were an unprecedented blessing. The opportunity to serve in youth ministry for as long as I have has been literally life-changing. My faith means the world to me. The people I live out every day with, and those that are less regular but still present, are incredibly important to me and I love all of you. If I die today, I would only regret not having a few more conversations with people. Even though it is hardly a milestone age to recognize (like 30 or 40, etc), it's just really weird to think about being 32 years old. To know that I'm closer to being 40 than I am to being 21. The year 2050 is as close as 1986, when I was born. I was already 11 by the time my mother had reached this age. Time has passed very quickly.

Thank you for being here with me for any part of those 32 years. Here's to 32 more with all of you.

"A Time Like This" Lyrical Analysis

Micah has been posting a lyrical analysis for each of the tracks on his new album, "A Time Like This." For each one, over some undetermined and inconsistent amount of time, I will post the link and the particular portion of the track that stands out to me. I would encourage you all to listen to the album if you haven't already, and to dive into the individual analyses.

Visit Micah's "A Time Like This" Lyrical Analysis for more insight.

1- A Time Like This

Lyric:
"I been through enough and I’m ready to quit
I don’t wanna explain my pain to no prick
No mic no stage I’m ready to stay hid
But when I go to run away the fire gets lit
Deep within my skeleton"

Micah's analysis:
"The conviction in (Jeremiah) was too strong and would not tolerate his attempt to stop speaking the truth of God. 'If I say, I will not mention him, or speak any more in his name, there is in my heart as it were a burning fire shut up in my bones, and I am weary with holding it in, and I cannot'” (Jeremiah 20:9).

My thoughts:
We all have things we are passionate about. Certain beliefs we hold dear, topics that we have strong opinions about, etc. When it comes to political/societal/moral issues, it's very easy for us to get bogged down by all that is present, and to individually want to pull back and remove ourselves from the conversations. When we do that, the passion does not wither and die. It still exists. When you know what is in your heart is right and needs to be heard, don't let that fire be extinguished. Maybe not to the point of raging, but that fire needs to burn bright for others to see and hear you. Progress is not attained on the strength of silence. Persevere, knowing the battle is worth fighting, no matter the cost.



2- Too Much?

Lyric:
"Done lost my way if I rise to the top of an exploitive
system unjust and corrupt
I seen what American Dreamin’ do to ya soul
Don’t let me be sedated by the power and the gold
Too many revolutionaries make a little dough
Then forget all of the people they was advocatin’ fo’"

Micah's Analysis:
"Many entrepreneurs and creatives of color start out with a mind to uplift their community, but are seduced by the american dream of incredible wealth available to those willing to compromise. Of course this is tempting to those who have known poverty for so long, but it is never worth it."

My thoughts:
In the most tangential moment of the track, Micah acknowledges that the pursuit of the "American Dream" is flawed. Essentially, I have been allotted a station in life, but I can change it and earn my way to the top if I so choose. However, this path often leaves others stuck in the situation I was originally in. We see this narrative play out all the time in media. The story of a lowly individual rising to power, along the way forgetting or harming those they were close to, only to realize their mistake and make amends in the end. The redemption side of things is usually left out of the real world. One need only have seen "The Greatest Showman" to have an example. The greatest conflict in the movie was not Barnum's original rise, but instead his abandonment of his friends and family once he achieved the success he so painstakingly sought. It is only once he realized his errors that he decided to focus on the important people in his life that he acquires true peace and happiness. This is not so easily played out in real life.



3- Fan Mail (ft. Propaganda)

Lyric:
"Gotta remember who you answer to
Who you write the anthems to
Who you raise ya hands to
Who dat Propaganda dude
Who be curing cancer
Who carry the answers
Who can unlock the dancers
Who be givin’ stanzas"

Micah's Analysis:
"When we fix our minds on the authority of God, the love of God, when we remember who we raise our hands and sing our songs for, when we remember the power of God to perform miracles, when we consider that God created us and knows us by name, we are no longer intimidated by those who might scorn us for being faithful to the call of God on our lives. Obviously, those who benefit from injustice will be critical of prophetic voices that call for the dismantling of unjust systems."

My thoughts:
This portion comes from Propaganda's verse on the track. As Micah says earlier in his analysis, "The tone of this song and album thus far is  aggressive. This however is not coming from a place of bitterness or hate. It is coming from a place of righteous anger and love." Society has a tendency to jump to conclusions and overreact about every opinion that is shared. Myself included. To move forward together we have to take a second to think about where the opinion is coming from and why it's being shared. This album is full of "controversial" thoughts and opinions, and it would be easy to come away from it thinking there is a lot of hate, blame, and disrespect going on, as if those things are the purpose. However, the source of those things is more than likely our own beliefs being challenged and us not knowing what to do about it. The album's focus, start to finish, is to glorify God and call attention to the unjust things that are happening in the world. Let us not be so quick to dismiss each other, but instead listen and ask questions.